Holidays

I just don’t like the holidays anymore. I look around and see something missing I know I should be thankful for still drawing breath, but instead I find myself missing good times gone and the dearly departed from my life. It’s getting harder and harder to adjust to the life I live vs. the vision I have for where my life should be.

I just keep seeing my life pass me by and sit in the city of my birth, isolated from my close family and friends. I’ve known my path would be solitary, but must it be so damned miserable? I feel like the only thing keeping me anchored to this life of late has 4 legs and a tail. I’ve finally reconciled my heart with my mind on the death of a marriage I should have known was gone years ago. I just don’t know if I’m strong enough to stick out this hardship tour I seem to be on. And it’s left me plain old empty. And tired. God, I’m so tired. And there’s no rest in sight.