Pitbull reality

So vicious he’s killin sleep! This is Jasper everyday. Don’t believe the media. Give him an those like him a chance to be what they are…dogs.

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I lay here, drinking Jack and thinking about where my life went wrong. And I realize, I made a lot of bad decisions, and am paying for it. If I’d have just gone with one decision instead of taking the high road as I saw it then, I wouldn’t be in the mess I’m in now. To her,I can only say again I’m sorry. I should have taken the offer when it was given. Lesson learned 15 years too late. I just can’t seem to make the right choice when it’s right in front of me. Instead I made one that led to pain and suffering. Only good I’ve gotten out of a decade of marriage has been a dog. A replacement puppy at that. Sad, but true. And now I wouldn’t trade him for the world. I wouldn’t mind having a human to share life with. Guess it’s not in my cards. Oh well, such is life!

Sick of it all…

I already had a crappy day. It got even worse at work, even without drama from my bosses. I’ve had it with this sham I call a life, I would’ve been happier as a soldier somewhere off at war. But I got talked out of enlisting. Stupid me. I probably wouldn’t have met my friends, not that more than a handful talk to me anyway now as it is. But it would definitely beat this shitty existence. I lay here, with my dog and dinner of teddy grahams and Jack Daniels and wonder why I’m still alive. Knowing I’m worth more dead than alive to my family. They don’t know this though. I didn’t think I was going to live past February, but I did. Just a secret between me and the blogosphere. I thought I’d be able to start my life over with an old friend. But it turns out, she reminded me of a point of honor I never thought I’d try to break. Specifically because it happens to be a commandment. I have to remember to thank her for reminding me. If I make it through the week. Time will tell.

Stay tuned.